Stronger.

It's been 3 months since I last posted about where Thurman and I were at. It's been a long three months filled with a lot of uncertainty, tears, therapy,surgery, recovery, and determination. I could go on and on about it all - but it's all in the past now. The point is we are here today. & we are still together.
I have to thank my blogger friend Jess for writing to me when I first shared the news and telling me, "sometimes times it takes a stronger woman to stay" those words stuck with me and really changed my attitude about it all. Because she was so right. The easy thing to do would be to walk away, play the victim, blame him for it all. But it does take a very strong person to stay and face it. Through all the hurt be able to admit that it wasn't just his fault our marriage had fallen apart. Thurman's affair wasn't the reason our marriage was broken, it was a symptom of his unhappiness.
And yes I will admit somedays are still a struggle for me. Forgiveness takes time I've been told. But we are working it out. I put my ring back on when Thurman asked if I would on Christmas day, to me that was a very big step. & the following week we started back in couple's therapy. I don't think we will need too many sessions though, just through our own individual therapy we learned how to communicate so much better. Thurman most definitely shows so much improvement. It was a hard road for him because it was just our marital trouble he had to work through. But I won't get into his personal story here, it isn't my place. & he is still continuing with his own therapy.
Now it's just a matter of keeping it up, not losing each other again in the chaos of day to day life, communicate, checking in when we start to veer off the path, compromise. date. flirt. love each other. lean on each other. have faith in each other.
I truly believe this did all happen for a reason. I obviously wish it never happened. But if we had not been tested we never would have had to face our real problems. We never would have broken the "cycle" & now we our stronger and more commited to each other and our family than ever.